Start with what your child uses
Ask your child to show you a game, group or app they enjoy. Ask what is fun, who they talk to and what can be difficult. This gives the agreement real situations to address rather than a list of bans.
Start with no more than three agreements. A child might ask before buying something, keep their address private and contact a named adult if someone pressures them.
Make the agreements specific
Write down what should happen: Which purchases need permission? When does the game end? Who can help if you are unavailable? Make room for your child’s ideas and adapt the agreement to their age and needs.
Include the adults
Include commitments for the adults. Ask before sharing a photo of your child and put your own phone away at the times you have agreed. Tell other carers about the agreement so your child knows what to expect.
Review the agreement
Choose a day to check in. A new app, friendship or routine may call for different agreements. Ask what works and adjust anything that is difficult to follow.
Safety settings can support your agreement but cannot prevent every problem. Your child still needs to be able to ask for help, including after breaking an agreement.